Disrespecting The Journey

I will make my Pilot Blog Post titled “Disrespecting The Journey” because as much as I want to get a career job as the next person, it is the journey that we go through that really changes and evolves us all.

The other day I was walking on a boardwalk inside a nature park to get some fresh air. I was pissed and stressed about the job hunt that I needed to clear my head. When I walked on the path I just kept moving forward barely looking at the beauty that surrounded me. I came to a realization that I have been so goal oriented these past few years that I have only been living in the future but not enjoying the present. “Living in the moment” as they say has not been something I been excited about. It’s what I plan for my future that keeps me going and why I push myself out of bed each morning.

Ever since I graduated from college I felt I have been stuck in this phase of life between the real world, responsibilities and the adolescence; still living with the parents, still acting out like a teenager even in my mid-twenties. I want to move forward and start my life but I keep getting held back by rejection, self-pressure and unplanned incidences that always seem to set me back a few steps. It’s exhausting, frustrating and overwhelming.

Life has been a true trial of challenges to my emotional well being and character. I think I need to start embracing the now so that a healthy future is prevalent. Even hitting rock bottom is part of the journey, the unpredictable tragedy of life or to others a wake up call. This past year I have felt every emotion from rage to sadness, from excitement to disappointment, and from nervousness to confidence. I’ve lost best friends but gained new ones in the process. I was in a car accident but learned to be a safer driver. I need to put things in perspective and realize that good things come from terrible situations.

Going back to the nature walk. When I finally slowed my paces down and stopped to look around, I noticed an entire other world, an ecosystem to be scientifically correct. I noticed a downed tree with plants making it their home, saw how the sunlight reflected off the pond and onto the leaves giving their color more vitality. I spotted a tree bark with an array of holes formed like a hole puncture for paper. A Woodpecker has been there at some point. I smelled the air and felt so rejuvenated and touched the leaves feeling a soft but rocky texture. It was unlike something I have experienced in a long time. Living freely in the moment and not worrying about the future never felt so satisfying. I went to the beach a few weeks back and plunged my body into the void of curling waves. The waves kept tossing me around like a toy. It was so fun as I rolled with the punches.

I will learn to embrace life and take my failures as bumps or changes in a much larger scheme. We don’t truly learn about who we are until we are faced with odds, until we make mistakes or lose something. Accepting the downs is just as important as embracing the ups. Keeping a positive perspective will make life a whole lot more enjoyable and less stressful. So I will do what I can to not disregard or to not disrespect the journey of life, to know that its there and to continue to push forward.

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